Day 3: A New Project!

Being on my third day in Unemployment-Land, I have officially started work on a new writing project. For the past few weeks I have been doing little ditty writing exercises here and there to clear my mind from my last screenplay, but now I am finally ready.

The plan: write an impossibly low-budget, Indie script set in New York. And I mean LOW budget. Nothing extraneous. Nada. Something very prosaic, where it's all about the people. Stripped to the bare bones of human interaction. I've never written with production in mind, so it'll be a different vantage point. I want it to be accessible to low-budget directors and producers, young artists like me looking to make a break.

I love the last two scripts that I've written, but they are by no means "low budget" - they involve wars and nuclear power plants, armies and European travels. This will not be that.

The Goal: Work long enough and hard enough to have a solid draft finished by July 1. 30 days and change for 120 pages ... oy!

I'm taking up the life of a real freelancer, writing from 9am-5pm, with only a break for lunch and errands half way through. I will be a slave to my computer, regardless of the bright sunny weather gloating me from outside my window (such as the case right now).

This is now my job, so stay tuned...

-E

Would you rather...

Be told that you didn't get a job OR that you had the job and now don't?

Is This Real Life?

I am unemployed. I am broke. I am an artist. Today, it all feels official.

For the first time in my life I have the time to write what I want, whenever I want. No master, no authority figure. On one side, it is liberating; the only rules and bounds that I face are those that I have set for myself. The other side of the coin, however, comes with a world of uncertainty and fear.

Writing is great, but paying my rent is even greater.

A travel journal, originally, this place has seen all sides of my opinions and view points - from my thoughts on Glee to Pat Robertson - so now, it is time for another shift. This will be my outlet, a portal into the life of a nobody Brooklyn writer trying to become a somebody.

For some preliminary information about my writing side, I am a film, theatre, and television writer with an odd love of pretentious literary fiction (I do hold a BFA after all, so it comes with the territory). I am terribly opinionated. I like what I like, and when I really hate something I always have a reason. Hate then, is separate from appreciation. I can appreciate a piece and yet truly hate the way it is written (cough, Virginia Woolf, Gertude Stein, cough), and I think that this is a necessary awareness for all writers. Appreciation of voice. Because, answer me this: what is a writer without their voice?

-E

[yes, I am aware I used "their" for "his or her" - I hate that gender neutral thing.]

Do you have Irish?

Tá sé fuar inniu. It is cold today!

In the spirit of geimhreadh - winter - here are some fun new Irish words that I'm learning. Ask me in a month if I'll be able to remember them, and the answer will probably be no. But for now ...

oíche -- night (eechya)
aingeal -- angel
fuar -- cold (foor)
seomra leapa -- bedroom (showmra lyapa)
Nollaig -- Christmas (no-log)
Chrainn Nollag -- Christmas Tree (crain no-log)
deoch -- drink (djaw)

-E

Amazon's EBook Publishing Scandal

This has just been a week of discovering publishing mishaps...

Amazon, I support your policy on publishing everyone. As a writer, I really, truly do. I am also all for free speech, really, I am. But a book promoting pedophilia? That is the crime of all crimes and is something that can never be defended. Ever. End of story.

The independently published ebook in question is titled, "The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure: a Child-lover's Code of Conduct" by Phillip R. Greaves.

Here's a BBC's article... it has more info on the whole deal, all of the drama, the controversy, what have you.

-E

"Wait, you mean there isn't copy-write online?"

As a writer, I find this absolutely ridiculous:

"In 2005 a writer called Monica Gaudio wrote a great article called A Tale Of Two Tarts, which discussed (among other things) apple pie’s Americanism (or not) and its evolution from a sugarless mixture of fruit and spices, cooked in a coffin (no, not THAT sort of coffin: read the article!) to its current sweet pastried form.

Roll on five years. Ms Gaudio had pretty much forgotten about her article until a friend of hers congratulated her on her piece about apple pies which she had just read in Cooks Source Magazine (I’m itching to put an apostrophe in there: anyone else?).  Cooks’ Source (sorry, I couldn’t hold out any longer) isn’t just a website: it is also a money-making print magazine, which has a whole stable of advertisers which contribute to its finances."

Check out the full article here.

-E

OH ... and a link to the "apology" on the homepage ... www.cookssource.com

But here is a snippet incase you don't feel like reading the whole shebang:

"Last month an article, “American as Apple Pie -- Isn’t,” was placed in error in Cooks Source, without the approval of the writer, Monica Gaudio. We sincerely wish to apologize to her for this error, it was an oversight of a small, overworked staff. We have made a donation at her request, to her chosen institution, the Columbia School of Journalism. In addition, a donation to the Western New England Food Bank, is being made in her name. It should be noted that Monica was given a clear credit for using her article within the publication, and has been paid in the way that she has requested to be paid."

Words From A Sudo-Pretentious Writer ...

I go to art school, I've gone to Tisch, and therefor I have a defacto air of pretension surrounding me. As much as I hate it, it is something that I am aware of and embrace wholeheartedly, but I do attempt to do everything in my power to supress my "know it all" urges.

This is not one of those times.

Being a writer is hard. It is work. End of story. It is something that you have to study and work at every day. It takes talent and skill and discipline, so it angers me when people think that they can do it, too. What has prompted my frustration, you might ask? Well, it's been a general mash-up of things, honestly. It's the pre-med student that thinks putting sentences together is easy, the architect that insists Waiting for Godot is a spiritual metaphor, or the uncle/aunt/insert-elder-here that says, "Oh, I've lived a crazy life, if I could I'd take 6 months off and write a novel." Yes. Because writing is that easy. I want to tell that person, "You do that. In fact, why don't we switch places, and while you're taking that six months off I'll go run your investment firm on Wall Street."

People forget that writing is actually a field of work, an art form. There is a reason I am earning a Bachelors of Fine Arts IN Writing. It is because I have worked and studied the craft for four years, just as a doctor has studied medicine and a business executive has studied business. So yes, I find it insulting when someone else says that they can do it too, "if only they had the time." We would all do anything if we had the time. I would be a surgeon - if I had the time - but you don't see me cutting into people just because I've watched the Health Channel one too many times.

Get into a conversation about a story or a novel or a movie with a writer and chances are you will get a debate. It's not a conscious thing; that's the way our brains work. We analyze and judge and criticize anything that makes an attempt at telling a story. If someone out there has found a way to turn that part of their brain off, then please, let me know! I do not say that a TV show/movie/book sucks because my life goal is to rain on your parade or because I think that I am smarter or more intelligent. I say that a TV show/movie/book sucks because it is conventional or stock or unintelligent. I say that a plot is cliche because it is, and nine times out of ten, I've seen Faulkner, Joyce, Saunders, O'Connor, Murakami, Marquez, Pamuk, MacDonagh, Wilder, or Beckett do it better.

-E

Like, literally!

This Week In Review

So, the week is almost at an end so I thought I’d do my best to fill the void with an update.

Sunday:
We made friends with random people in our hostel -- aka 3 guys from Sri Lanka, a guy from Namibia, and then a Parisian from Gambon who confessed his love for me after about 10 minutes. His name was Barton and he looked like Djimon Hounsou.

Monday:

The Huntarian Museum at the University of Glasgow was closed for the 3rd day in a row, so Jaime and I wandered around the city for the entire day. Found these really awesome bridges and ended up wandering through the equivalent of Scottish New Jersey on the North Side of the city. It was pretty epic. There is photo documentation. Then we saw A Single Man and I fell in love. It was wonderful.

Tuesday:

We took a cab to Glasgow airport at 0500, only to arrive at 5:30 and learn that we were in fact at the wrong airport (no one bothered to correct us). So we ended up taking a £100 cab ride to the correct airport an hour away and luckily got there just before the gate closed. Then after security they weighed our bags (which has never happened before) and we ended up having to pay £35 each for carry-ons that the flight crew didn’t even check. We finally got back to our flat in Dublin around 0900, just in time for Jaime to get to class. Thus ... the actual day began.

Went to lunch at Chorus, where we ran out of time so Sirus let us take our plates and silverware to class and then bring it back. It was pretty great. Kerry and I just walked in to Susanne’s class with these massive plates of omelets and chips ... people were jealous and we were full. In class I had to suffer the torment that was the movie Adam and Paul, and I’m pretty sure I am the only person that hated it with a burning passion. In a word: boring. I just wrote a review on it, so I might share my thoughts in a little bit, have no fear.

Then around 0930 Steven and Kristen finally got here (apparently the immigration guys looked me up in the computer to varify that they were staying with me and that I was a valid temporary citizen -- WEIRD) and we went to grab a pint over at Farrington’s. The music was great, but not gonna lie, we were dead. The day felt like a week.

Wednesday:

Fintan O’Toole came and spoke to us. It was pretty epic. I’ll be honest though, since he’s a theatre critic and all I definitely thought he was going to be talking to us about, you know, Irish theatre, but the entire thing ended up being about post-Celtic Tiger Ireland. It was incredibly interesting, actually, and I really want to read his new book now. After class Steven and I skyped into our first Orientation Meeting back at Pratt and were pretty amused. It was a fun time, seeing people and thinking about all the stress that awaits us back in the states. Joy.

Thursday:
Oh, today. Did I mention that the first draft of my full length play is due in less than 24 hours? Fun, right? Not. Lies. All lies. I’ve been teetering page 56 for the past week and can’t seem to stretch things out any further so far. It’s awesome. So, instead, I am watching Eraser with Kristen and Steven, drinking my third cappuccino of the day, and eagerly awaiting my take-away from Queen of Tarts.

Tonight is going to be a looooooong night.

-E

Perrier’s Bounty, aka: Mark O’Rowe is good craic!

Dear interwebs, it looks like the luck of my theatre/cinema classes is finally starting to kick in over here in Eire because I went to see the new Irish film Perrier’s Bounty tonight and I think I fell a little bit in love.

Written by Mark O’Rowe (Intermission, Terminus, Howie the Rookie), Perrier’s Bounty is basically the perfect combination of profanity, violence, humor, family, love, and Irish. It’s basically what would happen if Quentin Tarantino, Neil Jordan, and Steven Soderbergh had a love child that looked like Cillian Murphy. O’Rowe actually came and spoke to my theatre class just the other week, and I have to say that this script came as a shock to me -- it was incredible in a sheerly entertaining way: witty, vulgar, realistic.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t come out in the states until the middle of May, so you folks have to wait for the joy. But have no fear, I will definitely go see it again!

-E

AND Cillian Murphy is a bit of an alright. I’m just saying.

Top Quotes:

“She’s odd, like a bag of carrots.”

“Fuck that shit, man.”

(paraphrase) “You get the coke or I go visit mom, make your pick.” “Coke.”